I thought I'd do something along those lines for my guests - a nice simple dinner, simply prepared and nothing fancy or expensive.
Who am I kidding?
That's not me at all - the very thought that people would come from America and have to put up with everyday food just isn't my way at all - I want to show off, to prove to our foreign chums that British food stands tall amongst the cuisine of the world, that we can actually rustle up a tasty dinner and all the international rumours about our food being bloody awful are just plain bollocks.
So I thought I'd do something traditional and British but do it with a bit of flair. No simple farmhouse paté for starters but a tasty terrine of fois gras, no humble roast chicken and Oxo gravy but some excellent free range guinea fowl with a sweet and meaty sauce, and some port and Stilton of course, where would our fine country be without port and Stilton - it's the very bedrock of our culture.
So my brother and his friend Ana got a fairly traditional British meal but done in a slightly grand style. Every course was accompanied by a different drink as is the fashion at expensive eateries frequented by celebrity types (though my guests didn't seem to drink as much as me, odd chaps these Americans*, very odd indeed). We sat around for about two hours eating and chatting and then retired to the lounge to watch Father Ted on DVD.
* Ana is actually Romanian but she's been living in America for some time now.
Frü: I've had Gü before, and now I've had Frü. A lemony cheesecake type thing which comes in a little glass ramekin. Quite good and even better with a glass of limoncina and a little more dribbled over the top.
Guinea Fowl with Redcurrant and Port Sauce
2 Guinea Fowl
2 Rashers Bacon
2 Bulbs Garlic
½ Litre Chicken Stock
Large Glass Port
2 Tbsp Redcurrant Jelly
1 Tbsp Plain Flour
Salt and Pepper
*All quantities are very approximate and for four people