The Great Punch in the Balls

Thursday 5/5/2005

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Diary and Notes

General election day - I've come to visit my commie sister Kerry and her pinko, neo-Trotskyite family for an election day special. They are hoping for a massive left wing victory (or at least a drubbing of the evil Darth Howard and the forces of the Empire) whereas I just see it as an excuse for a good nosh up and a glass of booze or two.

I am interested to know how my prediction went. (see 3/5/2005) though after the last day's campaigning and the roasting Tony Blair has been receiving in interviews etc. I was beginning to think they would do worse than I had previously expected. I wasn't expecting a Conservative win - that would have been a near impossibility - I just thought that the Labour Party might be given a metaphorical punch in the balls from the electorate - a result that's fine by me.

So how did it all go?

Swimmingly I reply. The beef way tasty and tender, the lentils...

Or did you mean the election?

The election went fine - it would have all been a bit tedious if it wasn't helped along by a few glasses of wine. My prediction was close enough (I based my calculations on a vote of 37% Labour, 33% Conservative, 22% Liberal and 8% others) though I hadn't expected the successful targetting by the Conservatives of the South East which skewed the results a little. All in all who cares? I'd much rather have a tasty piece of forerib of beef than an election any day. I have to confess the beef was less pink than I'd hoped (much like my sister's view of the election results) - mainly due to my sister getting back from her hairdressing appointment half an hour late (she was getting it done for a wedding on Saturday) - but it was still pretty good.

Fortunately we don't have to suffer another tedious bout of lies, counter lies and statistics for another four or five years. By then my Noshblog will have finished and I shall be long gone. - just like good old Tony Blair.


Cake Blog

Sherry Trifle: Easy to make but even easier to buy - especially if you are in a bit of a hurry and are already cooking dinner for 5.


  • Farmhouse Paté and French Bread

  • Forerib of Beef with Lentils
  • Garlic and Parsley Potatoes
  • Buttered Spring Greens

  • Sherry Trifle


    Dish name
    1 Forerib of Beef (2kg)
    200g Lentilles de Puy
    2 Rashers Bacon
    1 Onion
    1 Carrot
    1 Stick Celery
    200ml Beef Stock
    200ml White Wine
    Olive Oil
    2 Cloves Garlic
    2 Tbsp Dijon Mustard
    Salt & Pepper
    1kg King Edward Potatoes
    2 Cloves Garlic
    Beef Fat
    4 Spring Onions
    50g Butter
    Bunch Flat Leaf Parsley
    Salt & Pepper


  • First prepare the lentils: Dice the carrot, onion & celery and sweat in a little olive oil. Chop the bacon into lardons and mince the garlic, add these to the pan and cook for a few minutes more. Stir in the lentils and the wine. Bubble for a few minutes then add the stock. Simmer gently for 20 minutes. Check to see if the lentils are soft (puy lentils will still retain a bit of texture and wont go mushy) - if they need more water or longer cooking add more water and cook a little longer. When the lentils are cooked season with a little salt and pepper. Leave the lentils slowly simmering while everything else cooks - the longer they cook the better they be.
  • Beef: Rub the beef with the mustard. Heat the oven to 220c then roast the beef for fifteen minutes to singe the outside a little. Turn the oven down to 170 and roast for an hour and a half. About half way through drain off the fat to use for the potatoes. When the beef is roasted stir the lentils into the pan to absorb any remaining juice and leave to rest for 10 minutes before carving.
  • Potatoes: Peel the potatoes and boil for about ten minutes. Cut into thick rounds. Pour over the beef fat and roast for 40 minutes. Make a paste from the minced garlic, butter, parsley, spring onions, pepper and salt and mix into the potatoes. Continue roasting until the beef is cooked and the potatoes are really crispy and brown.


    *All quantities are very approximate and for six people