Map and Compass? No Need, We're Experienced Men of The Mountains

Sunday 12/6/2005

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Diary and Notes

Another walk in the hills today. After my speedy success of zooming between Edale and Glossop last Saturday (see 4/6/2005) I thought I'd try again, only this time taking a more cunning route and avoiding the five km hike along the Snake Pass at the end. I was planning to beat my fantastic time and get the walk/jog done in less than three hours. "What a beast." You must be thinking, "What a shining example of Anglo-Saxon manhood, what a warrior." And yes, you should be thinking like this, only...

Today I wasn't alone.

And that sounds like I am going to blame all the problems and mistakes on the person who came on this hike with me but I wont, we are both a pair of bungling buffoons and neither of us deserves any respect from anyone.

We got lost. My friend, Laurie and I, got completely lost and ran around the moors near Kinder Scout for three and a half hours before realising we were only half an hour from where we had started from. Oh yes, we were making good time, if we had any idea which way Glossop was we would have made it in under three hours easily, only we didn't, we didn't have the slightest clue.

We were cursed by a few minor problems. The first being a 'local' who said he knew the way. This I will blame partly on my chum Laurie for not believing me when I said we were going the right way. We were jogging past some skinny dude who looked like he walked a lot and in order to test my theory as to which way to go Laurie started shouting to me "So is this the way to Glossop, are you sure?" etc. and without asking (though this was what Laurie had hoped for) the man piped up:

"You two are going completely the wrong way." And began to convince us that we were going back towards Edale and were completely lost. So we took his advice, ran back for half an hour and then asked two other people who told us we had just ran back towards Edale (as I had suspected all along) - and then I started to make things worse.

"Why don't we cut along this way." I said pointing, "I'm sure that goes to Glossop." and off we ran - and then we lost the path and then we were really lost. Wading through bog up to our knees with no landmarks for miles. Probably doubling back on ourselves more than once. All the time making good speed, but going nowhere.

After three hours we saw a huge chimney in the far distance, which I was sure was the cement works at Glossop and our spirits were lifted and on we trudged, only it wasn't Glossop at all, we were heading straight back to Edale and making complete fools of ourselves at the same time. I am not sure exactly how, but we even managed to overtake the same people on at least three separate occasions. Humbling it was, very humbling.

Of course we ended our walk back in Edale where it had all began. We had a few beers and then were rescued by Laurie's girlfriend, Rachel and her Ford Focus. Hurrah. Next week I'll take a compass.

When I got home all bedraggled and wet, Fran had prepared me dinner. She was having a barbecue and there was some excellent talapia in honey and mustard. A baked potato or two and a glass of wine and all the troubles and aches just slipped away. Next week I'll beat three hours, you'll see, either that or I'll be lost on the moors for ever.

Cake Blog

An Orange and Chocolate Chip Muffin. How many more muffin varieties are there? I shall search for more. I like muffins.


  • Honey and Mustard Talapia
  • Baked Potatoes